Aragorn & Arwen
by Lavender Mansworth
Summary: This is a thrilling play about Aragorn and Arwen, including Dolores the Peanut, friendless Balrogs, and Gandalf walking around with a pink bucket on his head! It basically has no point, but it's silly.
1. Scene I

Disclaimer: If I owned these characters, do you really think that I would be posting this on a Fan Fiction website? No! I'd be getting it published,  
and making much money! So, to answer the question you never asked, I  
DON'T OWN ANYTHING!  
  
Note: This play contains many excerpts from various other works such as: Finding Nemo, Lemony Snicket's The Series of Unfortunate Events, and SpongeBob SquarePants. And some of the words, like "Winklehoven" and some other phrases that you have never heard before are from my friend Beq (aka Rosemary Parkinsons)and I. It is mainly, though, about LotR, thus why I have classified it as a LotR fan-fic! Just wanted to clear that up! Comment sont, let's begin!]  
Scene I  
In some room in somewhere Note: The story starts in the scene from the second movie when Aragorn is lying in that room on that freakish bed with Arwen standing over him saying  
the following:  
  
Arwen- Go to sleep.  
  
Aragorn- I am asleep.  
Note: About right here is where I stop abiding by the movie and start  
making up my own version!  
  
Arwen- No your not!  
  
Aragorn- Am too!  
  
Arwen- Are not!  
  
Aragorn- Am too!  
  
Arwen- You know, maybe I should take the ship into the Greyhavens! This  
world is too overpopulated with mortals who don't know the difference  
between sleep and...awakenness!  
  
Aragorn (confusedly)- That's not a word!  
  
Arwen (defensively)- Well if you can be yelling while your allegedly  
sleeping, then I can say "awakenness"!  
  
(Enter Elrond)  
  
Elrond- What is it daughter, why are you yelling?  
  
Arwen- Oh, Daddy! When are the next ships leaving for the undying Lands?  
  
Elrond (excitedly)- Then you have made your decision? You will leave this foolish mortal to fulfill your destiny that was selfishly set by me for my own personal enjoyment in watching you torn from the love of your life just  
because I SAID SO! I mean, ahem...tomorrow night...  
  
Aragorn- But you can't leave! We're supposed to spend the rest of our lives together, happily residing in Gondor to rule our faithful subjects!  
  
Elrond- Aragorn, she has made her choice (and a good one too, I might add,  
darling!) and you shall not stop her! No one will! No one!  
(Evil laughter)  
Aragorn & Arwen- Exchange looks 


	2. Scene II

Scene II  
At the ship place  
  
Aragorn- Wait! Wait! Stop!  
  
(Running to boarding/dock place)  
  
Arwen (annoyed)- Aragorn! I am trying to board the ship in a dignified  
manner!  
  
Aragorn- Before you go, I must ask you: Arwen Undomiel, Daughter of Elrond,  
Lady of Rivendell, O Fairest of the Elves-  
  
Arwen (interrupting him)- Quit it with the titles and get to the point!  
I'm on a tight schedule here, bucko!  
  
Aragorn- All right, all right! D'you wanta marry me?  
  
Arwen- You know, I would, but Daddy says I can only marry a man no less  
than the king of Gondor and Arnon.  
  
Aragorn- But I am!  
  
Arwen- really? When did that happen?  
  
Aragorn- After ther War of the Ring, duh! Remember?  
  
Arwen (dawning of comprehension)- Oh yeah! Well...okay then!  
  
Aragorn- Great! Well, what do we do now?  
  
Arwen- We'll have to elope; because I don't think Daddy will like this too  
much...I say we go to Gondor!  
  
Aragorn- Ying! 


	3. Scene III&IV

A/N: Yes, the last chapter was repulsively short, so I have decided to fromnow on put 2 scenes in every chapter. Oh, and THANK YOU to all you people who have been reviewing! Ciao!

Scene III  
Riding along a scenic country road  
  
Aragorn- Yeah, I seem to be spending a lot of time there. It's like, every  
time I wake up, I'm in Gondor!  
  
Arwen- Really? How strange!  
  
(Éowyn rides up)  
  
Aragorn (excitedly)- Hi Éowyn!  
  
(Arwen scowls murderously)  
  
Éowyn (smiling flirtatiously)- Hello, Master Aragorn!  
  
Aragorn- Hey, Arwen! Why don't we get married in Edoras instead? That's  
such a jolly place!  
  
Arwen (through clenched teeth)- Um, Aragorn, why don't you go get some  
water from that well over there?  
  
Aragorn- A well! How convenient!  
  
(Runs off to his conveniently located well)  
  
(Arwen pulls Éowyn off her horse, and pushes her against a tree by her  
neck)  
  
Arwen- Listen, pony girl! Don't you even think about it! He is so mine! As a matter of fact, we are going to Gondor right now, to get married! Got  
it?  
  
Éowyn- Squeak! Nod!  
  
(Aragorn returns)  
  
Aragorn- That well was so convenient! It just...  
(Looks between Arwen and Éowyn)  
  
Aragorn- Uh...Winklehoven?  
  
Arwen (snappishly)- Did you get the water?  
  
(Aragorn hands her a bucket of water)  
  
(She dumps it on Éowyn's head)  
Éowyn- Squeak!  
(Jumps on horse and rides away)  
Aragorn (pouting)- Hey! Does this mean I have to get more? (Arwen glares the glare of a person ready to throw a heavy bucket that once  
contained water at her soon-to-be-husband)  
Aragorn- Uh oh. Am I in trouble?  
  
Scene IV  
Approaching Gondor  
  
Aragorn- Can I have a snack now?  
  
Arwen- No!  
  
Aragorn- Just a little one?  
  
Arwen- No!  
  
Aragorn- pretty please with sugar on top?  
  
Arwen- No!  
  
Aragorn (distracted from his desperate hunger, and now pointing over yonder  
hills)- Oh look! Gondor!  
  
Arwen (irritably)- Yay.  
  
(Enter Éomer)  
  
Éomer- Greetings King Aragorn!  
  
(They enter the gates of the city)  
  
Éomer- All hail the King of Gondor!  
  
(Cheering people)  
  
Éomer- I said all hail the King! Not welcome him cheerily!  
  
(Murmurs throughout the crowd, as the people kneel)  
  
Arwen (suddenly happier)- Ooh! I suppose there will be a feast! With  
pork! Mmmm...pork.  
  
Aragorn- I made a special request for pork...I think. No! Wait! Yes! Wait!  
  
Arwen (pushing through the crowd)- get me in there and let me at that pork!  
Mmmm...pork.


	4. Scene V&VI

Scene V  
In some eating place in the castle thing in Gondor  
  
Arwen- Hey! Where's all the roast pork?  
  
Éomer- Pork? The king asked specifically for turkey!  
  
Aragorn- I, uh, just remembered someplace I have to be!  
  
(Edges out of room)  
  
Arwen (hyperventilating)- I...WANT...PORK!!!!!!!! Ahem...please.  
  
(Enter Faramir)  
  
Faramir- Hello all! It's great to back in good old Gondor! I haven't been here since just after the Siege of Gondor when I was nearly burned to death  
by my insane father! Rather depressing day that was...  
  
Éomer- Greetings, brother. Please have a seat! Enjoy our feast and rejoice! For Arwen of Rivendell and Aragorn son of Arthorn have come to  
wed!  
  
Faramir- Hey! That's great news! I would have a seat, but I've been  
riding all day, and it's a real pain in the-  
  
(Enter Aragorn)  
  
Aragorn- Is Arwen-I mean everybody settled down?  
  
(Notices Faramir)  
  
Aragorn- oh! Didn't see you there! How's it going?  
  
Faramir- Pretty good. We lost a couple horses the other day...Oh yeah, and  
we kind of, well, lost Éowyn too...Have you seen her?  
  
Aragorn- Actually-  
  
Arwen (interrupting)- Nope! No siree! Not the blink of an eye in ages!  
Definitely did not see her on the way here! Too bad, huh?  
  
Faramir (looking at Arwen as though she is insane, which is not far from  
the truth in this story.)- Uh, yeah...sure...  
  
Scene VI  
Outside of the castle  
  
Person- Attack! Attack! We're under attack!  
  
Aragorn- What's going on?  
  
Éomer- Hello? Don't you see the Orcs swarming the countryside?  
  
Aragorn- Orcs? I thought those were bushes! (Sheepishly) I'm near-  
sighted...  
  
Arwen- What's happening? I hear screams of terror!  
  
Éomer- We're being attacked by Orcs!  
  
Arwen- Where? I can't see anything!  
  
Aragorn- Are you near-sighted too?  
  
Arwen- Aragorn, you idiot! I'm an elf! Elves are not near-sighted!  
  
Éomer- Arwen's right! What happened to all the Orcs in the past few  
seconds?  
  
(Enter Faramir)  
  
Faramir (dusting his hands off)- Well, that was easy!  
  
Aragorn (staring)- What-what did you do?  
  
Faramir (nervously)- I, erm, killed the Orcs?  
  
Aragorn- But-but that's my job!  
  
Faramir- (clears throat guiltily) 


	5. Scene VII&VIII

Scene VII

Still outside the castle

Note: This scene contains dialogue taken from Finding Nemo which you will recognize when you read, unless of course you have not seen the movie, in which case you should go out immediately and buy it, as it is the best children's movie ever made! The scene also contains the phrase, "What a fox!" which is conveniently taken from SpongeBob SquarePants.

Saruman's voice- Open the gates! Open the gates! Open the (coughing fit) GATES!

Orc's voice- Cough drop my lord?

Saruman's voice- No, you fool!

Different Orc's voice- Bring down the gates!

(Cheering, yelling, obscenity screaming Orcs heard)

(Gates opened; note that they were not 'brought down')

(They see that there are only 3 Orcs accompanying Saruman, one of whom is hastily shoving a tape recorder marked 'Battle of Helm's Deep' into his pocket)

Éomer- Boo.

Orcs- Aah!!!!!!!

(They flee terrified)

Saruman- People of Gondor! Hark the words that I speak with my mouth! I have defeated you! Finally!

(Evil laughter, interrupted by coughing fit)

(Orcs comes up behind him)

Orcs- cough drop, my lord?

Saruman- No, you fool!

Éomer- but Saruman, Faramir-I mean, we killed all your Orcs!

(Long pause)

Saruman- oops.

(Freakish Taco Bell Chihuahua comes up)

Saruman (gasps)- Puppies! I will call you Squishy, and you will be mine! You will be my Squishy!

People- Charge!

Saruman- girly scream!

(Throws Squishy into the crowd, where he is caught by Arwen)

(People push Saruman to edge of cliff where he hangs dexterously by one hand)

Arwen- Aragorn! You're filthy! Go wash your face in that well over there.

Aragorn- A well! How convenient!

(Runs off to his conveniently located well, again!)

(Aragorn, with water in his eyes, staggers blindly about)

Aragorn- Aah! I can't see!

(Walks into tree)

Aragorn- Sorry miss, didn't see you. (As he walks away) What a fox!

(Aragorn is now crawling blindly about)

(Grabs Saruman's hair)

Aragorn- Ah! A towel! Bit hairy, isn't it?

Saruman- No, you fool! That's my toupee!

(Pushes the 'towel' away, taking Saruman with it)

(Saruman falls off cliff)

Saruman (as he falls)- You shall (coughing fit) PERISH!!!!!

(Orc jumps off after him)

Orc (calling as he falls)- Cough drop my lord?!?!

Saruman- No, you fool!!! I'm trying to be dignify-

(Large 'splat')

(Aragorn, who is still staggering blindly, walks into a tree again)

Aragorn- Sorry again miss. (As he walks away) Still a fox!

Scene VIII

In battle with Orcs that have come after Saruman fell off the cliff

Éomer (As he battles several Orcs)- Aragorn! We must evacuate Gondor! Take Arwen and make for Edoras!

Arwen- No! Anything but that!

(Aragorn grabs Arwen by her arm)

Aragorn- Get on that horse right now!

(Arwen fights by tooth and nail)

Arwen- fight by tooth and nail!

(Aragorn attempts to toss Arwen onto the saddle, but misses by a couple of feet)

(Finally they begin to ride, when Aragorn accidentally bumps Arwen with his elbow)

Arwen- Nyeh!

(Bumps him back)

Aragorn- Nyeh!

(Bump)

Arwen- Nyeh!

(Crash into tree)

Aragorn- What a fox!

(Arwen smacks him)

Tree- hacking cough!

Aragorn- cough drop my lord?

Arwen- No! Wrong person...and wrong role!

Aragorn- Oh! I mean...Ack! Who are you?!?!

Tree- We be chillin' in da hood wit our homies dawg!

Aragorn- wtf?

Tree- Word!

Arwen- What up ma peepz?

Tree- Yo, we be dippin' in da hood, home dawg!

Aragorn- freakos! FREAKOS, I SAY!

Arwen(disgustedly)- word!

Tree- Fo schizzle!


	6. Scene IX&X

A/N: Greetings once again, my dear friends! I must add a quick note, giving mucho credit to my friend Beq aka Rosemary Parkinsons, as I have just remembered that she did indeed practically co-write much of this play with me during LA when we were suppposed to be working on our poetry project! Joy of joys! Credit to Beq! Down with trucks!

Scene IX

Edoras

Arwen- Why did you have to drag me here of all places?

Aragorn- Arwen, we can still get married in Edoras!

Arwen (looking shocked that he would even consider the idea)- No, we most certainly cannot! I will get married in Gondor, or nowhere!

(Enter Éowyn)

Éowyn- Greetings Master Aragorn!

Arwen- Hey, pony girl, he happens to have become a king I the past few months!

(Éowyn looks surprised)

Arwen- Yeah, that's right, and by the way, you better have pork! Mmmm...pork.

(Aragorn shoves her aside)

Aragorn- My dear Éowyn! How are you m'lady?

(Arwen scowls murderously once again, as she does often in the presence of Éowyn)

Éowyn (ignoring Arwen's previous comment about Aragorn's recent kingship)- Lovely Master Aragorn! I trust you had a safe journey?

(They walk off, chatting, into another room)

Arwen (sighing)- Oh well, I suppose I shouldn't be so jealous... Wait! What am I saying? I must be going insane! It's my job to be jealous!

(Stalks off screaming Aragorn's name)

Scene X

Riding away from Edoras

Note: The dialogue that Saruman speaks as he is lying in the road is taken from a play that Bec wrote on some computer program she has.

Aragorn- Why did you have to drag me off in the middle of the main course?!?!

Arwen- Well, I'm sorry, but that goody-goody, girly-girl was making me sick! And plus, they didn't have any pork!

Aragorn- Well, you could have been a little nicer!

Arwen- I didn't feel like it!

(Conversation cut short by the view of Saruman lying in the middle of the road, with an Orc next to him)

Saruman- Cough, cough, I think I may die. I feel cold, and every bone in my body is broken in at least 27 places. (Long pause) Hark! I am healed!

Arwen- Oh joy!

(Gets off her horse and does a jolly dance at Saruman's feet)

Saruman- This jigging girl must be my miracle healer!

Aragorn- I'm confused!

Saruman- Cough, cough. How about that cough drop now, minion!

Orc (frustrated)- I thought you were trying to be "dignified"!

Saruman- No, you fool! I'm dying!

Orc- oh. Ahem...(fumbles in his pocket and pulls out a bag of Hall's Cough Drops)

Saruman- Thank you, minion!

(Pops it into his mouth)

Arwen- Well, congratulations on your cure, but we really must be going!

(They trot off)

A/N: Quite short, quite pointless, quite amusing. I enjoyed it, how about you? Oh dear, I can't hear you, as for all I know you could be on the other side of the world in relation to me, or, then again, you could be one or two houses away from me. Either way, it doesn't matter, REVIEW! And once again, thanx to Beq who will kill me if I don't emphasise her credit. THANK YOU BEQ!!!!! Happy now, my dear friend? Good. Ciao!


	7. Scene XI&XII

Scene XI

Still riding in an aimless direction

Note: Gandalf's...erm..."accessories" are derived from a particularly interesting Math class in which my math teacher wore (and carried) the same thing. Please don't ask me why...

(Legolas and Gimli approach)

Aragorn (waving)- greetings comrades!

Legolas (with Western accent)- Howdy Aragorn; Arwen! Where y'all headed?

Arwen- what's with the accent?

Gimli- Sudden obsession with Western movies and country music...

Arwen- Ah ha...

Aragorn- So, How's it going? What's been going on? I don't know much about the news, as we've been rather, erm, shielded by her overprotective father...

Legolas- Well, Frodo has the One Ring, and he's going with Sam Gamgee on a dangerous and probably fatal quest to destroy it for the good of Middle Earth!

Arwen (to herself)- Hey! I thought this was after the War of the Ring!

Aragorn- But-but, we have to go after them, and help them!

Arwen (to herself, again)- Even though they have supposedly done it before and succeeded fine!

Legolas- You cannot go after Frodo and Sam! Sauron thinks Pippin has the ring! I don't know why, but...

Gimli- Hey, we were in Gondor a couple days ago, and we saw that freakish white tree! It's looking rather sickly. You know, you should water it or something!

Aragorn- Yeah, well, it's in Gondor, and we are not! And plus, Gondor is currently under attack by Saruman's Orcs!

(Freakish white tree suddenly appears, looking wilted and sickly)

Arwen- How convenient! Now you should go get some water from that well over there!

Gimli- A well! How convenient!

Aragorn- That's my line!

Aragorn- A well! How convenient!

(Runs up onto the hill to the conveniently located well)

(Enter Gandalf, wearing a pink bucket on his head and carrying a neon orange, plastic baseball bat)

Aragorn- Hello Gandalf! I am choosing to ignore the fact that you are wearing a pink bucket on your head, and carrying a plastic, neon orange baseball bat, and am just going quietly back to getting water from this conveniently located well!

Gandalf (in a bored tone)- so I see.

(Enter Balrog)

Gandalf- Aah!!!!!!!

(Balrog grabs Gandalf in his fist and proceeds to carry him away)

Balrog- Friend!!!!!!!!!

Gandalf- Aah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Aragorn- Gandalf! Noooooooo!!!!!!!!!

(Aragorn runs down the hill to his fellow comrades)

Aragorn- Gandalf has been taken to be a Balrog's friend!

Arwen- Gasp!

Gimli- Gasp!

Legolas- Hot gasp!

All- We must save him!

Scene XII

In various places

Note: The basic plot for this chapter was based on an odd dream that I had, and felt like including in this manuscript. I basically just substituted the LotR characters for the actual people in my dream, so any freakish, unrealistic things are the product of my overly active imagination during the dreaming process.

Legolas (no longer with a western accent)- What a strange sensation I'm feeling!

Gimli- How odd! The air seems to have gone cold!

Arwen- I feel all tingly!

Aragorn- I'm confused!

(The four are suddenly transported to a large cliff, where several boats are waiting at the top of a series of waterfalls)

(Enter Boromir)

Boromir- Greetings, my friends! (Suddenly in excessively happy game-show host voice) And welcome to "Let's Find Gandalf"! The rules are simple folks: You find Gandalf, and you could win- A NEW CAAAAR!!!!!!! Now, it's time to play-

Studio audience (?)- LET'S-FIND-GAAAAAANDAAAAAALF!!!!!!!!

Arwen- Well, uh, I guess we get into these boats.

(Aragorn, Arwen, and Legolas get into one boat)

(They go to push off into the mini-waterfalls)

Legolas- Wait! Where's Hagrid?!?!

Everyone else- OH, NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(They all jump out of the boats and run to the edge of the cliff for some telepathic reason)

Aragorn- Look!

(They look over the edge of the cliff and see Hagrid driving by in a white pick-up truck)

Arwen- Don't worry, I'll get him!

(She jumps off the cliff and safely lands on the roof of Hagrid's truck)

(A few moments later, she appears out of thin air with Hagrid in tow)

Gimli- What are you doing with that poor man?

Arwen (shrugging)- I dunno!

(She lets him go, and he falls over the edge of the cliff)

(Suddenly, Arwen falls back into a deep abyss filled with chocolate syrup)

Legolas- Don't worry Arwen, I'll save you!

(He pulls a long jelly doughnut, and casts it into the abyss)

(He pulls out Arwen)

Aragorn- Oh, Arwen! You're okay!

(Arwen glares and turns away)

Aragorn- What's the matter?

Arwen- You didn't save me!

Aragorn (frantically)- I was, uh...being held captive by hostile bush babies in the Amazon Rain Forest!

Arwen- And you escaped?!?!

Aragorn (Proudly)- Yup!

Arwen- You're my hero!

(She hugs him)

(Suddenly, they are transported back to where they were before)

Aragorn (poutily)- Hey! I never got my new car!


	8. Scene XIII&XIV

Scene XIII

Traveling aimlessly with Legolas and Gimli

Note: I never could have created this scene without my good friend Anna, who recently got 10" of her hair chopped off to donate to hair-lacking children. (We decided that bald children sounded a bit too...strange.)

Legolas- What's that?

Aragorn (squinting)- That looks like an oliphaunt!

Legolas- Cool! Let's go try to kill it, and do some incredibly fake computer-animated stunts on it!

Aragorn- Fun!

Legolas- I'll try and contact Peter Jackson and his crew so he can edit them.

Aragorn- Okay! Let's go computer animate us killing that oliphaunt!

Legolas- But wait. We're stuck in Middle Earth right now. Where are we going to get cameras and other various equipment needed to use computer animation?

Aragorn- Good point. You need computers to do incredibly fake, computer animated stunts! And fakeness.

Legolas- Fakeness isn't a word!

Aragorn- Oh yes it is! If Orthanc and Hogwarts can be words, then fakeness surely can!

Legolas (scoffing)- What's a Hogwarts?

Aragorn (defensively)- Well, what's a Hagrid?

Legolas- Enough! We can discuss this at a better time!

(begins to walk away)

Aragorn- Aren't we going to computer animate ourselves doing incredibly fake computer animated stunts on that oliphaunt?

(Legolas puts his head in his hands and sighs)

Legolas- Let's just go save Frodo and Sam...

Aragorn- O-kay!

Scene XIV

Sam and Frodo on Mt. Doom

Note: Once again, here is another scene basically written by Anna(with only some alteration by me), so give her credit! Thanx Anna!

Frodo- It...is...too...heavy...

(faints)

Sam- Well, let's see. I can either leave him for dead here on the mountainside, or I can carry him up to the Cracks of Doom and wait for him to awake. I think I'll take him up the mountain, because I'm a "good friend"! And Frodo gives "good friends" money!

(flashback)

(Sam walks into Bag End)

Sam- Mister Frodo?

Frodo- Oh, Sam! There you are! I want to show my new book that I wrote! It's about a happy frog!

(walk into room with book on table)

Frodo- Here it is!

Sam- Oh, Mister Frodo! It sounds so jolly!

(Frodo accidentally knocks over inkbottle)

Frodo- Gasp!

Sam- I'll save it mister Frodo!

(Sam runs to wipe it up with his handy-dandy handkerchief)

Frodo- Oh, Sam! You're a good friend! Here, have this bag of money!

Sam- Oh, thank you Mister Frodo!

(end flashback)

Sam- hee hee hee...

(Frodo wakes up)

Frodo- Oh, Sam! Thank you for saving me and not leaving me for dead on this mountainside! Remind me to give you a bag of money when we get back to Bag End!

Sam- No problem.

Frodo- These Orc clothes were a good idea! Now we won't get caught!

(Orc walks up behind them)

Orc- And what would two small Orcs be doing climbing Mt. Doom at this hour?

Sam- Uh...

(Smeagol magically appears at Sam's side)

Sam- Taking this miserable creature up to the top of this mountain to throw him off!

Orc- Oh, okay!

(Orc walks away)

Frodo- That was close!

Smeagol- Gollum!

(Sam flings him aside, causing him to fall off the mountain)

(Orc arrow hits Frodo in the back)

Sam- That wasn't. (Suddenly dramatic) Oh, Mister Frodo! I'll never leave you! I shall carry you to the top of this god-forsaken mountain! I'll destroy the One Ring for you if I must! But I shan't leave you, dear Mister Frodo!

(Frodo sits up, perfectly fine)

Frodo (exasperatedly)- Oh, Sam! You really must stop being so melodramatic! I have no desire to be carried by you along with your various cooking utensils!

Sam (incredulously)- But-but Mister Frodo! You've been shot!

Frodo- Oh, Sam! No I haven't! This is a Styrofoam prop!

Sam- Really? I mean...ahem...I knew that!

(suddenly, a flying object comes hurdling towards Sam)

Sam (pointing at the object)- What's that?!?! Aah!!!!!!!!!!

(catches the object and begins to violently beat it with various items in his possession, including several expensive looking pots and pans)

(suddenly, he stops abruptly)

Sam- Oh, just an old Orc helmet!

(throws it off the mountainside)

(when it gets to the bottom, it hits Saruman in the head, causing him to get knocked out)

Orc- cough drop my lord?


End file.
